//theDate = new Date(); //var day = theDate.getDate(); //var month = theDate.getMonth() + 1; //var day = theDate.getDate(); //var year = theDate.getYear(); //year = (year < 2000) ? year + 1900 : year; //var textdate = month + '/' + day + '/' + year; //var qt = day * (month - Math.ceil(month/3)*3 + 3); var julian var monthsall=new Array("Jan","Feb","Mar","Apr","May","Jun","Jul","Aug","Sep","Oct","Nov","Dec"); var todayis; var today=new Date(); var yearnow=today.getYear(); //Year 2000+ for Netscape and Opera if(navigator.appName == "Netscape") {yearnow=1900 + yearnow;} var yearstart = "Jan" + " " + "1" + ", " + yearnow; todayis=monthsall[today.getMonth()] + " " + today.getDate() + ", " + yearnow; julian = Math.round((Date.parse(todayis) - Date.parse('Jan 1,' + yearnow))/(86400000)) + 1; //86400000 milliseconds per day var numquotes = 367; quotes = new Array(numquotes+1); quotes[1] = "Everyone will experience the consequences of his own acts. If his acts are right, he\'ll get good consequences; if they\'re not, he\'ll suffer for it. -- Harry Browne"; quotes[2] = "Whatever our creed, we feel that no good deed can by any possibility go unrewarded, no evil deed unpunished. -- Orison Swett Marden"; quotes[3] = "You cannot do wrong without suffering wrong. -- Ralph Waldo Emerson"; quotes[4] = "Choose the way of life. Choose the way of love. Choose the way of caring...Choose the way of goodness. It\'s up to you. It\'s your choice. -- Leo Buscaglia"; quotes[5] = "The great successful men of the world have used their imagination...they think ahead and create their mental picture in all its details, filling in here, adding a little there, altering this a bit and that a bit, but steadily building-steadily buildings. -- Robert Collier"; quotes[6] = "Each time you are honest and conduct yourself with honesty, a success force will drive you toward greater success. Each time you lie, even with a little white lie, there are strong forces pushing you toward failure. -- Joseph Sugarman"; quotes[7] = "A country can be judged by the quality of its proverbs."; quotes[8] = "Success doesn\'t come to you...you go to it. -- Marva Collins"; quotes[9] = "The lure of the distant and the difficult is deceptive. The great opportunity is where you are. -- John Burroughs"; quotes[10] = "\'Where did you learn to whisper -- in a HELICOPTER?!\' -- Stand-up comic Jerry Dye to a table of Miami inebriates dividing their dinner bill"; quotes[11] = "What this power is I cannot say; all I know is that it exists and it becomes available only when a man is in that state of mind in which he knows exactly what he wants and is fully determined not to quit until he finds it. -- Alexander Graham Bell"; quotes[12] = "The golden opportunity you are seeking is in yourself. It is not in your environment; it is not in luck or chance, or the help of other; it is in yourself alone. -- Orison Swett Marden"; quotes[13] = "I do not think there is any other quality so essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature. -- John D. Rockefeller"; quotes[14] = "Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first."; quotes[15] = "Life in abundance comes only through great love. -- Elbert Hubbard"; quotes[16] = "Love is the immortal flow of energy that nourishes, extends and preserves. Its eternal goal is life. -- Smiley Blanton"; quotes[17] = "Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes."; quotes[18] = "Problems are only opportunities in work clothes. -- Henry J. Kaiser"; quotes[19] = "Opportunities? They are all around us...there is power lying latent everywhere waiting for the observant eye to discover it. -- Orison Swett Marden"; quotes[20] = "Most successful men have not achieved their distinction by having some new talent or opportunity presented to them. They have developed the opportunity that was at hand. -- Bruce Barton"; quotes[21] = "We don\'t need more strength or more ability or greater opportunity. What we need is to use what we have. -- Basil S. Walsh"; quotes[22] = "Destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice. It is not something to be waited for; but, rather something to be achieved. -- William Jennings Bryan"; quotes[23] = "I dream, therefore I exist."; quotes[24] = "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity. -- Joseph Sugarman"; quotes[25] = "In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity. -- Albert Einstein"; quotes[26] = "A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds. -- Francois Bacon"; quotes[27] = "There is no future in any job. The future lies in the man who holds the job. -- George Crane"; quotes[28] = "Opportunity...often it comes in the form of misfortune, or temporary defeat. -- Napoleon Hill"; quotes[29] = "The price of success is perseverance. The price of failure comes cheaper. -- Anonymous"; quotes[30] = "Adversity reveals genius, prosperity conceals it. -- Horace"; quotes[31] = "I contend that dishonesty will create a failure force that often manifests itself in other ways - ways not apparent to the outside observer. -- Joseph Sugarman"; quotes[32] = "Failure is not an option. It comes bundled with your Microsoft product."; quotes[33] = "Everything takes longer than you think."; quotes[34] = "The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance -- it is the illusion of knowledge. -- Daniel J Boorstin"; quotes[35] = "If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong."; quotes[36] = "If there is a worse time for something to go wrong, it will happen then."; quotes[37] = "If anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway."; quotes[38] = "If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a procedure can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop."; quotes[39] = "Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse."; quotes[40] = "If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something."; quotes[41] = "Nature always sides with the hidden flaw."; quotes[42] = "Mother nature is a bitch."; quotes[43] = "It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious."; quotes[44] = "The cure for all the ills and wrongs, the cares, the sorrows, and the crimes of humanity, all lie in the one word \'love\'. It is the divine vitality that everywhere produces and restores life. -- Lydia Maria Child"; quotes[45] = "Every solution breeds new problems."; quotes[46] = "Trust everybody ... then cut the cards."; quotes[47] = "Two wrongs are only the beginning."; quotes[48] = "If at first you don\'t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried."; quotes[49] = "To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles."; quotes[50] = "Exceptions prove the rule ... and wreck the budget."; quotes[51] = "Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view."; quotes[52] = "Force, and fraud, are in war the two cardinal virtues."; quotes[53] = "War is the great scavenger of thought."; quotes[54] = "War is the supreme drama of a completely mechanized society."; quotes[55] = "The quickest way of ending a war is to lose it."; quotes[56] = "Anyone who has ever looked into the glazed eyes of a soldier dying on the battlefield will think hard before starting a war."; quotes[57] = "There is nothing so subject to the inconstancy of fortune as war."; quotes[58] = "War is regarded as nothing but the continuation of politics by other means."; quotes[59] = "Apple Copyright 1767, Sir Isaac Newton."; quotes[60] = "I\'m trying to die correctly, but it\'s very difficult, you know."; quotes[61] = "All men think all men mortal, but themselves."; quotes[62] = "Life yields only to the conqueror. Never accept what can be gained by giving in. You will be living off stolen goods, and your muscles will atrophy."; quotes[63] = "Opportunity rarely knocks on your door. Knock rather on opportunity\'s door if you ardently wish to enter. -- B.C. Forbes"; quotes[64] = "Society often forgives the criminal; it never forgives the dreamer."; quotes[65] = "He who sleeps half a day has won half a life."; quotes[66] = "While the doctors consult, the patient dies."; quotes[67] = "Friends are like fiddle strings, they must not be screwed too tight."; quotes[68] = "A friend to all is a friend to none."; quotes[69] = "The calmest husbands make the stormiest wives."; quotes[70] = "The shortest answer is doing."; quotes[71] = "To talk without thinking is to shoot without aiming."; quotes[72] = "When the sword of rebellion is drawn, the sheath should be thrown away."; quotes[73] = "The mob has many heads but no brains."; quotes[74] = "Speak not of my debts unless you mean to pay them."; quotes[75] = "A blind man will not thank you for a looking-glass. -- English Proverb"; quotes[76] = "He that is born to be hanged shall never be drowned."; quotes[77] = "The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can\'t find them, make them. -- George Bernard Shaw"; quotes[78] = "Flattery makes friends and truth makes enemies."; quotes[79] = "Life without a friend is death without a witness."; quotes[80] = "Translators, traitors."; quotes[81] = "If a man deceives me once, shame on him; if he deceives me twice, shame on me."; quotes[82] = "The nail that sticks up will be hammered down."; quotes[83] = "There are many paths to the top of the mountain, but the view is always the same."; quotes[84] = "Do not use a hatchet to remove a fly from your friend\'s forehead."; quotes[85] = "Of all the thirty-six alternatives, running away is best."; quotes[86] = "There is hope from the sea, but none from the grave."; quotes[87] = "When the apple is ripe it will fall."; quotes[88] = "Marry a mountain girl and you marry the whole mountain."; quotes[89] = "Life is a bridge. Cross over it, but build no house on it."; quotes[90] = "It is better to sit down than to stand, it is better to lie down than to sit, but death is the best of all."; quotes[91] = "If your buttocks burn, you know you have done wrong."; quotes[92] = "A wise man hears one word and understands two."; quotes[93] = "The course of true love never did run smooth."; quotes[94] = "Buy a Pentium 4/3.0 GHz so you can reboot faster."; quotes[95] = "2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2. -- George Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-Four"; quotes[96] = "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong."; quotes[97] = "What force is more potent than love. -- Igor Stravinsky"; quotes[98] = "My software never has bugs. It just develops random features."; quotes[99] = "If anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway."; quotes[100] = "Best file compression around: \"DEL *.*\" = 100% compression"; quotes[101] = "The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in."; quotes[102] = "If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something."; quotes[103] = "BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding"; quotes[104] = "BUFFERS=20 FILES=15, 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!"; quotes[105] = "REMEMBER! TAXES ARE DUE TODAY!
Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay..."; quotes[106] = "\'I do not whine for lower taxes. I do not petition for more tax breaks. I ask only for instructions an ordinary PhD in economics can follow.\' -- Alan S. Blinder, PhD"; quotes[107] = "Every solution breeds new problems."; quotes[108] = "As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing."; quotes[109] = "Two wrongs are only the beginning."; quotes[110] = "Every situation, properly perceived, becomes an opportunity. -- Helen Schucman"; quotes[111] = "All computers wait at the same speed."; quotes[112] = "DEFINITION: Computer - A device designed to speed and automate errors."; quotes[113] = "Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view."; quotes[114] = "AMERICANS: They are what they are, but they are the only Americans we have. -- Helmut Schmidt (with a sigh)"; quotes[115] = "A penny saved may be a penny earned, but it\'s one boring penny. A penny invested, on the other hand, bounces around. [It] buys a guy a balcony seat in the theater of macroeconomics. -- Susan Stewart"; quotes[116] = "ACCOUNTING: An Art Without a Muse -- Fred Schwed, Jr."; quotes[117] = "There was a time when a fool and his money were soon parted, but now it happens to everybody. -- Adlai Stevenson"; quotes[118] = "YIDDISH PROVERB: With money in your pocket, you are wise and you are handsome and you sing well, too."; quotes[119] = "Don\'t gamble! Buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don\'t go up, don\'t buy it. -- Will Rodgers"; quotes[120] = "\'Well,\' the cynical old joke goes, \'the firm made money, and the broker made money -- and two out of three ain\'t bad.\'"; quotes[121] = "\'Wall Street,\' reads the sinister old gag, \'is a street with a river at one end and a graveyard at the other.\' This is striking but incomplete. It omits the kindergarten in the middle.\' -- Fred Schwed, Jr."; quotes[122] = "It\'s a very old saying: The bulls make money and the bears make money -- but not the pigs. \'It took me some time,\' wrote Fred Schwed about Wall Street, \'to discover this to be particularly untrue.\'"; quotes[123] = "\'They come from a poor neighborhood. They had a poor butler, a poor maid, a poor gardener, a poor chauffeur...\' -- Louis Lapham"; quotes[124] = "\'The higher are a people\'s intelligence and moral strength, the lower will be the rate of interest.\' -- Eugen Bohm von Bawerk, early Nineteenth Century Austrian economist"; quotes[125] = "Hammurabi, around 1800 BC, set the maximum interest rate at 33-1/3% per annum for loans of grain repayable in kind, 20% for loans of silver. The Romans limited interest to 8-1/3%."; quotes[126] = "In 1860, usury ceilings in most states were 6% or 7%, though higher in such risky places as Texas and California. Virginia and North Carolina made usurers disgorge twice the total debt."; quotes[127] = "\'That money talks I\'ll not deny. I heard it once. It said, \'Goodbye.\'\' -- Richard Armour"; quotes[128] = "Lady Godiva of Coventry, in 1057, so exasperated her husband pleading that he lower taxes that he agreed -- but only if she'd ride through town naked. She did. He did. -- Little Brown Book of Anecdotes"; quotes[129] = "AN EXPERT: \'Anyone fifty miles from home.\' -- Alan Abelson"; quotes[130] = "\'A gold mine is a hole in the ground with a liar on top.\' -- Mark Twain (quoted in Yale Hirsch\'s Stock Trader\'s Almanac)"; quotes[131] = "An English critic once said of Mahler\'s music: \'It\'s much better than it sounds.\'"; quotes[132] = "Advice from Retired CIA deputy chief, Adm. Bobby Inman on dealing with Congress: \'If you\'ve raised teenagers, you\'ve got a head start.\'"; quotes[133] = "SOCIAL SECURITY: The very first check, for $22.54, was paid in 1940 to a Vermont woman who had paid $22 in Social Security taxes. By the time she died, in 1974, age 100, she had collected $20,944.42."; quotes[134] = "\'Buy straw hats in the wintertime,\' Bernard Baruch is alleged to have said. \'Summer will surely come.\'"; quotes[135] = "\'Nobody goes there anymore -- it\'s too crowded.\' -- Yogi Berra"; quotes[136] = "\'Nothing is more suicidal than a rational investment strategy in an irrational world.\' -- John Maynard Keynes"; quotes[137] = "\'Like so many, this author has made his worst investment mistakes when he was the most certain about being right.\' -- Bennett Goodspeed, THE TAO JONES AVERAGES"; quotes[138] = "\'October. This is one of the singularly most dangerous months to speculate in stocks. Others are November, December, January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August and September.\' -- MARK TWAIN"; quotes[139] = "KNOW YOURSELF: \'If you don\'t know who you are, the stock market is an expensive place to find out.\' -- Adam Smith"; quotes[140] = "OLD JOKE: Married people live longer. \'No, it only seems longer.\' (Actually, people with \'significant others\' DO live longer than those living alone.)"; quotes[141] = "\'Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. [Not talent, not genius ... ] The slogan \'press on\' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.\' -- Calvin Coolidge"; quotes[142] = "\'Anyone taken as an individual is tolerably sensible and reasonable -- as a member of a crowd, he at once becomes a blockhead.\' -- SCHILLER, as quoted by financier Bernard Baruch, 1932"; quotes[143] = "\'You pay a very high price in the stock market for a cheery consensus. Uncertainty is actually the friend of the buyer of long-term values.\' -- Warren Buffett"; quotes[146] = "\'You know the best tax shelter of all? Just pay your taxes.\' -- Every investor who ever lost $20,000 trying to save $10,000 in taxes."; quotes[145] = "State trooper to a motorist he\'s just stopped: \'First of all, you were speeding. And I\'m not sure, but I think you also broke one of the new tax laws.\' -- Louthan cartoon"; quotes[146] = "\'My lawyers have an unlimited budget, and every year they exceed it.\' -- Frank T. Carey, ex-chairman IBM"; quotes[147] = "\'Congress should know how to levy taxes, and if it doesn\'t know how to collect them, then a man is a fool to pay them.\' -- J.P. Morgan, in what author Gerald Carson termed, \'the indiscretion of a lifetime.\'"; quotes[148] = "\'When there is an income tax, the just man will pay more and the unjust less on the same amount of income.\' -- Plato"; quotes[149] = "\'To tax and to please, no more than to love and be wise, is not given to men.\' -- Edmund Burke"; quotes[150] = "It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious."; quotes[151] = "\'Idleness and pride tax with a heavier hand than kings and parliaments. If we can get rid of the former, we may easily bear the latter.\' -- Benjamin Franklin"; quotes[152] = "It was Homer who wrote that $1,000 invested at just 8% for 400 years would grow to $23 quadrillion. But, he wrote, \'the first 100 years are the hardest.\' (This was Sidney Homer, of Salomon Brothers.)"; quotes[153] = "\'TOO MUCH AIN\'T ENOUGH\' -- sign above the Lone Star Cafe"; quotes[154] = "\'If I\'d put just $2 million into that deal,\' whimpered a real estate investor a long time ago, with genuine remorse, \'I\'d be a rich man today!\'"; quotes[155] = "\'Sure it\'s just a billion dollars. But a billion here and a billion there and pretty soon it begins to mount up.\' -- Senator Everett Dirksen"; quotes[156] = "\'To the old money, the world is a conspiracy of thieves. To the new money, the world is a department store.\' -- Louis Lapham"; quotes[157] = "\'Rich people plan for three generations. Poor people plan for Saturday night.\' -- Gloria Steinem"; quotes[158] = "Graffitum seen beneath Bankers Trust\'s brass nameplate: \'NOT ME THEY DON\'T.\'"; quotes[159] = "UNIMPRESSED. Oscar Wilde, upon seeing Niagara Falls for the first time, is said to have remarked: \'It would be more impressive if it flowed the other way.\'"; quotes[160] = "FANATICISM: Redoubling your efforts when you\'ve lost sight of the objective. -- George Santayana"; quotes[161] = "Monkey see, monkey do? According to US News & World Report, at least 29 people shot themselves imitating the Russian roulette scene in \'The Deer Hunter\' after it was on TV."; quotes[162] = "\'Now boys,\' said the hopeful soul at poker, \'if we all play carefully, we can all win a little.\' -- Fred Schwed, Jr., from his book WHERE ARE THE CUSTOMERS\' YACHTS?"; quotes[163] = "\'LACK of money is the root of all evil.\' -- George Bernard Shaw"; quotes[164] = "Winston Churchill, upon being told that a certain fellow was modest: \'Yes, well -- he has a lot to be modest about.\'"; quotes[165] = "Inflation, someone quipped, allows you to live in a more expensive neighborhood without moving. Actually, mild inflation tends to \'lubricate\' economic friction by giving the illusion of prosperity."; quotes[166] = "\'The power to tax involves the power to destroy.\' -- John Marshall, 1819

The power to tax is not the power to destroy while THIS Court sits.' -- Oliver Wendell Holmes, 1928"; quotes[167] = "\'BREAKFAST ANYTIME, said the sign, so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.\' -- Steven Wright"; quotes[168] = "Jacqueline Kennedy, just 33 at the time, when asked by a reporter where the Democratic National Convention should be held, \'suggested Acapulco.\' -- PARADE."; quotes[169] = "John D. Rockefeller\'s father, an itinerant vendor of quack medicine, is said to have boasted: \'I cheat my boys every chance I get. I want to make \'em sharp.\'"; quotes[170] = "LITTLE SLIPS: Prescott Bush reportedly had to destroy 19,000 letters seeking money to help pay off debts from his aborted 1982 Senate campaign. All were mistakenly addressed, \'Dear Rabbi...\'"; quotes[171] = "\'In the final analysis, productivity is the most important, most crucial thing for the success of the new order.\' -- Lenin"; quotes[172] = "\'If I owe a million dollars, I am lost. But if I owe $50 billion, the bankers are lost.\' -- Celso Ming, 1978, prophetic Brazilian economist, as quoted by Yale Hirsch"; quotes[173] = "\'The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings. The inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries.\' -- Winston Churchill"; quotes[174] = "CYNIC: Someone who knows the price of everything but the value of nothing. -- Oscar Wilde"; quotes[175] = "A STATISTICIAN is someone who can draw a straight line from an unwarranted assumption to a foregone conclusion. -- Yale Hirsch"; quotes[176] = "\'Don\'t fall in love with your stock. The stock doesn\'t know you own it.\' -- Adam Smith, The Money Game"; quotes[177] = "\'Beware of past performance \'proofs\' in finance. If history books were the key to riches, the Forbes 400 would consist of librarians.\' -- Warren Buffett"; quotes[178] = "\'Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.\' -- Benjamin Franklin"; quotes[179] = "OLD MADISON AVENUE ADAGE: \'When you have nothing to say -- sing it.\'"; quotes[180] = "THE SOVIET UNION: Under Lenin, like a religious revival. Under Stalin, like a prison. Under Khrushchev, like a circus. Under Brezhnev, like a post office. -- Zbigniew Brezinkski"; quotes[181] = "The 1970 Institution Investor conference of 2,000 of the nation\'s top money managers picked National Student Marketing Corp as its \'stock of the year.\' In the next five months, NSMC fell from 140 to 7."; quotes[182] = "Two of Murphy\'s best laws: (1) Never teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig. (2) The longer you wait in line, the greater the likelihood that you are standing in the wrong line."; quotes[183] = "An IRS agent, verifying a taxpayer\'s deductions, calls a rabbi and asks, \'Did Mr. ----- really donate $100,000 to your synagogue?\' Ever resourceful, the rabbi replies, \'No, but he will.\' -- Old Joke"; quotes[184] = "\'I am torn up inside when I see waste. Waste comes in many forms: underutilized spaces, discarded materials, traffic jams, empty buses.\' -- Eric Konheim, 1963-1991, kayaker and environmentalist"; quotes[185] = "\'Every gun that is fired, every warship launched ... signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed.\' -- Dwight D. Eisenhower"; quotes[186] = "\'Money can\'t buy love, but it sure makes shopping for it a lot easier.\' -- Anonymous"; quotes[187] = "James Baker, at the 1983 economic summit, realized President Reagan had not read his briefing book. When Baker asked him why, Reagan explained, \'Well, Jim, THE SOUND OF MUSIC was on last night.\'"; quotes[188] = "\'Castro asked which of us was an economist. I thought he\'d said COMMUNIST, so I immediately said, \'I am.\' \'OK,\' Castro said: \'you handle the economy.\'\' -- Che Guevara story (via Andrei Gromyko)"; quotes[189] = "\'You will never be poor as long as you have hope.\' -- Donald Trump"; quotes[190] = "\'The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any.\' -- Katherine Whitehorn"; quotes[191] = "Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear."; quotes[192] = "Daddy, why doesn't this magnet pick up this floppy disk?"; quotes[193] = "Give me ambiguity or give me something else."; quotes[194] = "I.R.S.: We\'ve got what it takes to take what you've got!"; quotes[195] = "We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse."; quotes[196] = "Pentiums melt in your PC, not in your hand."; quotes[197] = "Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!"; quotes[198] = "Always remember you\'re unique, just like everyone else."; quotes[199] = "Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot."; quotes[200] = "\'Each American citizen uses 2-1/2 times as much energy as his European or Japanese counterpart.\' -- The Economist, December 22, 1990"; quotes[201] = "Shell to DOS... Come in DOS, do you copy? Shell to DOS..."; quotes[202] = "Japanese kids go to school 8 hours a day, 240 days a year. American kids: 6 hours, 180 days. Half of one percent of Japanese 17-year-olds are functionally illiterate -- versus 8% of American 17-year-olds."; quotes[203] = "\'If someone gets ticket by doing tricky, Bodrum Airlines has rezerved the rights that there is no must to give a permation that passenger gets on the board.\' -- Turkish airline rule, quoted in The New Yorker"; quotes[204] = "\'God could not be everywhere, so he made mothers.\' -- Jewish proverb"; quotes[205] = "\'Guys, just remember: if you get real lucky, if you make a lot of money, if you go out and buy a lot of stuff -- it\'s gonna break. ... THINGS just don\'t mean happiness.\' -- H. Ross Perot"; quotes[206] = "\'The nicest thing about money is that it never clashes with anything I wear.\' -- Anonymous model"; quotes[207] = "\'My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income.\' -- Errol Flynn"; quotes[208] = "One great speculation is worth a lifetime of prudent investing. The problem comes in finding that great speculation."; quotes[209] = "Global population is growing by a quarter million a day. Ten years from now, we\'ll be sharing Spaceship Earth with about a billion more passengers. That\'s one new China per decade."; quotes[210] = "\'There is nothing like higher prices to attract more buyers. In department stores you mark merchandise down to move it. On Wall Street you mark it up.\' -- Michael Metz, Oppenheimer"; quotes[211] = "\'It would be difficult to find any plausible argument for supposing that gold will weaken in dollar terms in the 1980s.\' -- THE TIMES of London, 12/12/79. Gold peaked 40 days later at $875, then collapsed."; quotes[212] = "The key to having more tomorrow is: spending less today."; quotes[213] = "\'We are not going to be able to operate our spaceship earth for much longer unless we see it as a whole spaceship and our fate as common. It has to be everybody or nobody.\' -- Buckminster Fuller"; quotes[214] = "\'Life is too short to be small.\' -- Disraeli"; quotes[215] = "\'The point is to get so much money that money\'s not the point any more.\' -- Earnest yuppie in a Wm. Hamilton NEW YORKER cartoon"; quotes[216] = "\'We have two classes of forecasters: Those who don\'t know -- and those who don\'t know they don\'t know.\' -- Galbraith"; quotes[217] = "Churchill\'s description of history: \'It\'s just one damn thing after another.\'"; quotes[218] = "One governor\'s best advice to another: \'Never screw up on a slow news day.\'"; quotes[219] = "\'If brute force doesn\'t work, you\'re not using enough of it.\' -- Anonymous."; quotes[220] = "H.L. Mencken defines puritanism: \'The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.\'"; quotes[221] = "\'Grandparents and grandchildren are natural allies against a common enemy.\' -- Toynbee"; quotes[222] = "\'To produce an income tax return that has any depth to it, any feeling, one must have Lived, and Suffered.\' -- Frank Sullivan, American humorist, journalist"; quotes[223] = "\'The point to remember is that what the government gives, it must first take away.\' -- John S. Coleman, address to the Detroit Chamber of Commerce"; quotes[224] = "\'There is one difference between a tax collector and a taxidermist -- a taxidermist leaves the hide.\' -- Mortimer Caplan, Time 2/1/63"; quotes[225] = "\'The only thing that hurts more than paying an income tax, is not having to pay an income tax.\' -- Lord Thomas R. Dunwar"; quotes[226] = "\'Few of us ever test our powers of deduction, except when filling out an income tax return.\' -- Gil Stern"; quotes[227] = "\'If Patrick Henry thought that taxation without representation was bad, he should see how bad it is with representation.\' -- The Old Farmer\'s Almanac"; quotes[228] = "Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math."; quotes[229] = "\'A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always count on the support of Paul.\' -- George Bernard Shaw"; quotes[230] = "\'It\'s very hard to save money. My last credit card bill was so big, before I opened it I actually heard a drum roll.\' -- comedienne Rita Rudner"; quotes[231] = "\'RALPH: Before I let you go to work, I\'d rather see you starve. We\'ll just have to live on our savings. ALICE: That\'ll carry us through the night, but what will we do in the morning?\' -- The Honeymooners"; quotes[232] = "\'You can\'t have everything. Where would you put it?\' -- Comedian Steven Wright"; quotes[233] = "\'Talking to politicians about the economy is like talking with eight-year-olds about sex. They have heard all the words, but they haven\'t a clue.\' -- Michael Aronstein"; quotes[234] = "\'On $50,000 a year you can\'t even keep clean.\' -- Herbert Hoover\'s Treasury Secretary Ogden Mills, when someone suggested you could live comfortably on $50,000 a year."; quotes[235] = "\'The first rule is not to lose. The second is not to forget the first rule.\' -- Warren Buffett"; quotes[236] = "\'It\'s far better to buy a wonderful company at a fair price than a fair company at a wonderful price.\' -- Warren Buffett"; quotes[237] = "\'A great investment opportunity occurs when a marvelous business encounters a one-time huge, but solvable, problem.\' -- Warren Buffett"; quotes[238] = "\'Panics do not destroy capital; they merely reveal the extent to which it has been previously destroyed by its betrayal into hopelessly unproductive works.\' -- John Stuart Mill, 1867"; quotes[239] = "\'The main thing about acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you\'ve got it made.\' -- George Burns to Jack Lemmon"; quotes[240] = "\'He took up pleasure at rather an early age and finally he decided that power was more interesting.\' Author Cary Reich on Italian industrialist Giovanni Agnelli."; quotes[241] = "Agnelli marveled at how financier Andre Meyer's souffles always emerged perfect, no matter when they rang for dessert. Meyer (says author Cary Reich) had instructed the cook to slip one in the oven every 5 minutes."; quotes[242] = "Famed 19th Century merchant John Wanamaker saw one of his employees in a dispute with a customer. He walked over to the clerk and whispered the secret of marketing: \'GIVE THE LADY WHAT SHE WANTS.\'"; quotes[243] = "\'Oil\'s been discovered in hell!\' shouts a broker at the Pearly Gates. All bolt; he follows. ST. PETER: \'I know why THEY\'RE running, but why you?\' BROKER: \'Who knows? Maybe there\'s something to it.\'"; quotes[244] = "SLOGAN: \'If your car is not becoming to you, you should be coming to us!\'"; quotes[245] = "DINNER GUEST TO THE WIFE OF ANWAR SADAT: \'Libya has all that oil and no people, you have all those people and no oil -- you know, if this were any other time in history, you\'d just go in and take it.\' MME. SADAT: \'THAT\'S WHAT I KEEP TELLING HIM!\'"; quotes[245] = "\'No amount of money ensures happiness. Happiness is satisfaction with whatever you\'ve got.\' -- David G. Myers"; quotes[246] = "\'You really don't need to begin saving for retirement before you reach 60. At that point, simply save 250% of your income each year and you\'ll be able to retire comfortably at 70.\' -- Jonathan D. Pond"; quotes[247] = "As they say in poker, \'If you've been in the game 30 minutes and you don\'t know who the patsy is, YOU\'RE the patsy.\' -- Warren Buffett"; quotes[248] = "\'This bull market will go much higher.\' -- Howard Ruff, September, 1987"; quotes[249] = "Asked what he thought about Western civilization, Gandhi is said to have replied: \'It would be a good idea.\'"; quotes[250] = "'When prosperity comes, do not use all of it.' -- CONFUCIUS"; quotes[251] = "\'Voters decide nothing; people who count votes decide everything.\' -- STALIN"; quotes[252] = "\'It\'s easy to have faith in yourself and have discipline when you\'re a winner, when you\'re number one. What you\'ve got to have is faith and discipline when you\'re not yet a winner.\' -- Vince Lombardi, Green Bay Packers"; quotes[253] = "\'You never achieve real success unless you like what you are doing.\' -- Dale Carnegie"; quotes[254] = "On Success:
To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded. -- Ralph Waldo Emerson"; quotes[255] = "He who laughs last, thinks slowest!"; quotes[256] = "Save the whales, collect the whole set."; quotes[257] = "A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries."; quotes[258] = "\'I\'m proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is, I could be just as proud for half the money.\' -- Arthur Godfrey"; quotes[259] = "There\'s too much blood in my caffeine system."; quotes[260] = "Artificial Intelligence usually beats real stupidity."; quotes[261] = "Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now."; quotes[262] = "Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies."; quotes[263] = "I wont rise to the occasion, but I\'ll slide over to it."; quotes[264] = "Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I."; quotes[265] = "Double your drive space - delete Windows!"; quotes[266] = "If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic."; quotes[267] = "Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes."; quotes[268] = "Consciousness: that annoying time between naps."; quotes[269] = "It takes twenty years or more of peace to make a man; it takes only twenty seconds of war to destroy him."; quotes[270] = "Don\'t take life too seriously, you won\'t get out alive."; quotes[271] = "I don\'t suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it."; quotes[272] = "Better to understand a little than to misunderstand a lot."; quotes[273] = "The gene pool could use a little chlorine."; quotes[274] = "When there\'s a will, I want to be in it."; quotes[275] = "Okay, who put a stop payment on my reality check?"; quotes[276] = "Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs."; quotes[277] = "I\'m as confused as a baby in a topless bar."; quotes[278] = "We have enough youth, how about a fountain of SMART?"; quotes[279] = "All generalizations are false, including this one."; quotes[280] = "Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine."; quotes[281] = "C program run. C program crash. C programmer quit."; quotes[282] = "Criminal Lawyer is a redundancy."; quotes[283] = "Clap on!, Clap off! clap@#&$NO CARRIER "; quotes[284] = "640K ought to be enough for anybody. - Bill Gates 1981"; quotes[285] = "92.5% of all statistics are made up"; quotes[286] = "A man needs a good memory after he has lied."; quotes[287] = "A little work, a little sleep, a little love and it is all over."; quotes[288] = "A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience."; quotes[289] = "Apple copyright 6024 b.c., Adam & Eve"; quotes[290] = "Bad knee, gotta run - Pat Buchanan to his draft board"; quotes[291] = "Beam me aboard, Scotty..... Sure. Will a 2x10 do?"; quotes[292] = "Build a watch in 179 easy steps -- by C. Forsberg."; quotes[293] = "C++ should have been called B"; quotes[294] = "Energizer Bunny Arrested! Charged with battery."; quotes[295] = "Noticing small changes early helps you adapt to the bigger changes to come."; quotes[296] = "Change Happens
Anticipate Change
Monitor Change
Adapt to Change Quickly
Change
Enjoy Change!
Be Ready to Change Quickly and Enjoy It Again & Again"; quotes[297] = "When you move beyond your fear, you feel free."; quotes[298] = "\'I didn\'t say that I didn\'t say it. I said that I didn\'t say that I said it. I want to make that very clear.\' - attributed to George Romney in National Review, 1967"; quotes[299] = "If you do not change, you can become extinct."; quotes[300] = "The best laid schemes o\'mice and men often go astray. -- Robert Burns, 1759-1796"; quotes[301] = "Remember that what\'s right isn\'t always popular, and what\'s popular isn\'t always right."; quotes[302] = "Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born."; quotes[303] = "Never underestimate the power of a kind word or deed."; quotes[304] = "Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life. -- Confucius"; quotes[305] = "In business and in family relationships, remember that the most important thing is trust."; quotes[306] = "Remember that a good example is the best sermon."; quotes[307] = "Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all they have."; quotes[308] = "Never swap your integrity for money, power or fame."; quotes[309] = "When you\'re buying something that you only buy once, buy the best you can afford."; quotes[310] = "Share your knowledge. It\'s a way to acheive immortality."; quotes[311] = "Watch the Andy Griffith Show to help keep things in perspective."; quotes[312] = "Be kinder than necessary."; quotes[313] = "Every person you meet knows something you don\'t. Learn from them."; quotes[314] = "Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom. And in all your getting, get understanding. --Proverbs 4:7"; quotes[315] = "Resist telling people how something should be done. Instead, tell them what needs to be done. They will often surprise your with creative solutions."; quotes[316] = "What is the use of living if not to be to strive for noble causes and to make this muddled world a better place for those who will live in it after we are gone? -- Winston Churchill"; quotes[317] = "Never sell your teddy bear, letter sweater or high school year books at a garage sale. You\'ll regret it later."; quotes[318] = "Trust in God but lock your car."; quotes[319] = "Act with courtesy and fairness regardless of how others treat you. Don\'t let them determine your response."; quotes[320] = "Don\'t major in minor things."; quotes[321] = "Loosen up. Relax. Except for rare life-and-death matters, nothing is as important as it first seems."; quotes[322] = "Don\'t use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved."; quotes[323] = "Think big thoughts, but relish small pleasures."; quotes[324] = "Remember that your character is your destiny."; quotes[325] = "Never apologize for extreme measures when defending your values, your health, or your family\'s safety."; quotes[326] = "Be bold and courageous. When you look back on life, you\'ll regret the things you didn\'t do more than the ones you did."; quotes[327] = "The young men know the rules. The old men know the exceptions. -- Oliver Wendell Holmes"; quotes[328] = "Life is 10 percent what happens to me and 90 percent how I react to it. -- Coach Lou Holtz"; quotes[329] = "Show extra respect for people whose jobs put dirt under their fingernails."; quotes[330] = "Be an original. If that means being a little ecentric, so be it."; quotes[331] = "Accept the fact that regardless of how many times you are right, you will sometimes be wrong."; quotes[332] = "Don\'t waste time waiting for inspiration. Begin, and inspiration will find you."; quotes[333] = "Only man can make the simple so complex."; quotes[334] = "Judge people from where they stand, not from where you stand."; quotes[335] = "When there is a hill to climb, don't think that waiting will make it smaller."; quotes[336] = "Never ask a barber if you need a haircut."; quotes[337] = "Become someone\'s hero."; quotes[338] = "Someone will always be looking at you as an example of how to behave."; quotes[339] = "\'Show me a thoroughly satisfied man and I will show you a failure.\' -- Thomas Edison"; quotes[340] = "\'If you enjoy it, it\'s not work\' -- Anonymous 14-year old"; quotes[341] = "You are a unique individual, just like everyone else."; quotes[342] = "\'It\'s kind of fun to do the impossible\' -- Walt Disney"; quotes[343] = "\'There is no likelihood man can ever tap the power of the atom.\' -- Robert Millikan
Nobel Prize in Physics, 1923"; quotes[344] = "Sam: Beer Norm?
Norm: Have I gotten that predictable? Good!
Cheers"; quotes[345] = "\'Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.\' -- Groucho Marx"; quotes[346] = "\'On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.\' -- Will Rogers"; quotes[347] = "Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners."; quotes[348] = "The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not \'Eureka!\' (I found it!) but \'That's funny...\' -- Isaac Asimov"; quotes[349] = "1.79 x 1012<\/sup> furlongs per fortnight.....It's not just a good idea, it's the law!"; quotes[350] = "QWERT: a unit of weight equal to 13 poiuyt avoirdupois (or 1.69 kiloliks), commonly used in structural engineering. -- Webster's Middle World Dicitonary, 4th ed."; quotes[351] = "If you can lead it to water and force it to drink, it isn\'t a horse."; quotes[352] = "\'In America, any boy may become president and I suppose that\'s just one of the risks he takes.\' -- Adlai Stevenson"; quotes[353] = "'The warning message we sent the Russians was a calculated ambiguity that would be clearly understood.' -- Alexander Haig"; quotes[354] = "Fourth Law of Thermodynamics: If the probability of success is not almost one, it is damn near zero.' -- David Ellis"; quotes[355] = "..Unix, MS-DOS, Windows NT (also known as the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly)."; quotes[356] = "The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing."; quotes[357] = "If a committee is allowed to discuss a bad idea long enough, it will inevitably decide to implement the idea simply because so much work has been done on it."; quotes[358] = "Amneisa used to be my favorite word...but then I forgot it."; quotes[359] = "Nothing astonishes men so much as common sense and plain dealing."; quotes[360] = "BUREAUCRACY: A method of transforming energy into solid waste."; quotes[361] = "Matter cannot be created or destroyed, nor can it be returned without a receipt."; quotes[362] = "Faced with the choice between changing one\'s mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everybody gets busy on the proof.
-- Galbraith\'s Law of Human Nature"; quotes[363] = "All I ask is a chance to prove money can\'t make me happy."; quotes[364] = "Children aren\'t happy without something to ignore, and that\'s what parents are for."; quotes[366] = "\'A jury consists of 12 persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.\' -- Robert Frost"; quotes[365] = "\'What the scientist have in their briefcases is terrifying.\' -- Nikita Khruschev"; quotes[366] = "\'These items may or may not be available at all times, and sometimes not at all and other times all the time.\' - notation at the bottom of a menu at a Ft. Bragg California restaurant"; quotes[367] = "Never cut what can be untied."; quotes[368] = "\'I am an enthusiast, but not a crank\' -- Wilbur Wright"; quotes[369] = "Technology is the word given to the stuff that doesn\'t quite work right just yet!"; quotes[370] = "\'Excellent education strengthens excellent teaching and research by some of those educated, activities that in their turn strengthen communities.\' -- Source: Jane Jacobs in Dark Age Ahead (2004). p. 175."; quotes[371] = "\'A plan is just a list of things that aren\'t going happen.\' -- Mr. Parker \'Way of the Gun\'"; quotes[372] = "Lead me not into temptation for I shall find it myself."; quotes[373] = "\'It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.\' -- Prof. Dumbledore"; quotes[374] = "Famous last words: \'I mean, how difficult can it be?\'"; quotes[375] = "How can I run Linux when my pet ferret is always stealing my mouse?"; quotes[376] = "Average \'survival time\' in 2004 for unprotected XP PC\'s before they are infected by viruses, 17 minutes. -- Source: APC, Internet Storm Center"; quotes[377] = "Beware of the man who would deny you access to information, for in his heart he dreams himself your master."; quotes[378] = "I would never join a club that would let me in as a member!"; quotes[379] = "The walls of Gold entomb us, the swords of scorn divide, take not thy thunder from us take away our pride."; quotes[380] = "Sitting on the fence isn\'t to bad, falling off is a bitch though."; quotes[381] = "Program \/n.\/ A magic spell cast over a computer allowing it to turn one\'s input into error messages."; quotes[382] = "Is it strange, everything is so easy when you know it, and so hard when you don\'t"; quotes[383] = "Give a child a hammer and the world is a nail!";